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If You Want Growth, Help Others GROW!

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If you want growth, help others grow.” ~Tony Abbacchi

Do you remember January 1st, 2010? It seems like so long ago, but I remember it was my first foray into group coaching when I launched a six-week coaching program for  women.

What began with ten women ended with five. After the six weeks, I remember feeling very disappointed and asking myself what could I have done differently to keep the five who did not follow through. I hadn’t yet learned what coaching was about. I thought it meant shouldering the responsibility for the those five women, and if I didn’t and they failed, I was to be blamed. I remember talking it through with my own coach and she said, “You can take the horse to the water, but you can’t force it to drink!” Lesson learned!

That self-reflection and self-blame nearly caused me to miss the growth of the other five. What did they do differently? They stuck it out and did the work.

Of the five who dropped out, three are still struggling today, 10 years later. The point is not to call them out (because I would not), but to ask the “What if?” question.

“Dare to dream, but even more importantly, dare to put action behind your dreams.” ~Josh Hinds

Over the past ten years, I haven’t strayed from my mission of supporting women. While I began by engaging in many “under-the-radar” activities with through mentoring and pro bono coaching, in the latter years, the engagement became more public and group-oriented.

“Incremental progress keeps us engaged and helps us grow.”

The start of this particular decade – 2020 – is rare and special. Rare, because it’s the only time we will be able to say we have perfect, 20/20 vision, and claim that “we can see clearly now”. Special, because it’s ‘Double 20’, an opportunity to receive a double dose of whatever we are dreaming of, or aspiring towards – if we persist.

Are you ready to seize the opportunity? Are you ready to GROW?

My vision for 2020 is all about  – Transformation and GROWth. Through my Let’s GROW project, I have committed to helping 20 women grow in 2020. This is specifically for the individuals who are participants in my Sip, Paint & GROW project on January 11, 2020, International Vision Board Day.

We will also be tapping into the growth vs fixed mindset idea advocated by Dr. Carol Dweck in her book, MINDSET: The New Psychology of Success.

Here’s a quick overview of the program, which comes into effect after the January 11th Let’s GROW event. I will be:

  • Facilitating coaching conversations through a private Facebook group for one full year, literally for FREE!* There are restrictions. See below.
  • Putting together a generous and motivated group of women committed to building give and take relationships** to advance their own careers, and by default, advancing the careers of others. It will not only be taking, but giving back and helping others (e.g. giving of their time, sharing their resources and network, and making connections).
  • Writing a book to chronicle stories worth sharing:  personal stories, or our dreams and aspirations. While it’s not mandatory, this book opportunity is restricted to any attendee from this 2020 cohort, if they choose. If you are an original member of the Let’s GROW group, and you wish to be a contributor to the book, please contact me.

My overall goal for the Group is for all of us to “contribute wherever we can without keeping score.” (Dr. Adam Grant), and help someone else GROW!

CAVEAT:

  • These coaching conversations* are limited and separate and apart from my regular services. For e.g., if you have a question around interviews or need clarity on an issue, you can ask me, but it’s not a substitute for interview coaching or other services.
  • Other than me, no participant / member is expected to offer FREE coaching services. That would be asking too much of them. However, as part of building a giving and taking relationship, they are asked to offer and receive what I call “Five Minute Favours”. After all, we are building a community.

As Tony Abbacchi says “When you give with expectations, not only will your reputation suffer but so will your mindset.”

** The Give and Take and “Five Minute Favours” concepts come from Dr. Adam Grant’s book Give and Take: Why Helping Others Drives Success.

As you begin 2020, here are six questions to ask yourself:

  1. Am I happier now than ten years ago?
  2. What have I done?
  3. What have I learned?
  4. Who have I become?
  5. Am I where I want to be?
  6. Where do I see myself a decade from now?

Are you ready to seize the opportunity? Are you ready to GROW? Contact me now, or engage the services of a coach who can guide you, but please, do something!

To your success!

Are You Feeling Stuck, Trapped and Fed Up?

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If you answered “Yes” to the above question, you are not alone. Many people are feeling just like you. They feel like the hamster – forever spinning its wheel but not gaining any traction. They are unhappy. Sometimes this unhappiness is about career, family, money, health, relationships or personal growth. At other times it’s the self-sabotaging conversations they have with themselves: “I can’t do it. I am not good enough. I don’t deserve it. It’s my fault. I am too old.” These negative self-talks don’t result in happiness, but in self-fulling prophecies. It’s worth knowing that whatever we focus on expands, so when we focus on negativity, that’s what we attract.

At this stage of your life, you may feel frustrated with the slow progress you are making, but don’t give up on yourself. It took you years to be where you are and it will take time to arrive at where you want to be. You deserve to live out your true potential, achieve your goals and realize your dreams. Figure out what’s holding you back, and take A.C.T.I.O.N.:

Abandon your old ways of thinking and doing things. If you continue doing what you have always done you cannot expect the results to be different.

Commit to letting go of what is holding you back so you can embrace your life with the vitality you need to take on your wildest dreams.

Tackle your goal one piece at a time. Break your major goal into manageable mini ones to avoid becoming overwhelmed.

Invest at least one hour each day, without fail, to work on your goals and dreams. Business Philosopher Jim Rohn said,“Don’t sit idly by while your dreams diminish to memories, and your hope gives way to remorse; neither should you allow time to slip through your fingers like grains of sand. Sage

Open yourself to other opportunities if your Plan A didn’t work out. Create and enlist the help of a team of positive people who will support, encourage and inspire you to move forward and achieve what you want in your life.

Network. Although networking might make you feel queasy and uncomfortable, it is an important skill to learn. Just like any new sport or hobby, the more you network the more comfortable you become.

There is no reason for you to continue feeling stuck, trapped, fed up and unhappy. You can transform your life if you are committed to taking one small step every day. Ponder the following questions:

  • Who will you be when nothing holds you back?
  • What kind of life would you create, and what kinds of goals would you reach for if you weren’t restrained by limiting beliefs?

If you are ready to let go of the fears and negative self-talk that keep you from growing; if you are ready to create and live a happier life; if you are ready to renew and GROW, join me on this FREE Webinar on Thursday September 8 at 8 pm EST to learn more.

“Happiness is not something you postpone for the future; it is something you design for the present.” ~Jim Rohn